Thursday 26th March

Found out last night that my cousin died in 2003 aged 45. I had written to an address I had found for him on my Uncles death certificate to find out about any relevant family illness for genetic purposes. I had no family connections with his side of the family for a long time. I wrote to him at the address I had found but with no avail. Then I found on the ancestry web site his death death index . This explains why I didn't get a reply. I put a return address on the back of the envelope but got nothing back.

After a week or so of looking and admiring the flowers sprouting in the garden I realised how I felt after my diagnosis. I felt how I would miss Spring and the sight of flowers and blossom on the trees with all their colours and beauty.

We went to our local Italian restaurant this evening and were given a shock by the waiter telling us the chef had died on Saturday on his way home in his car from a heart attack they thought. There is going to be a post mortum. He was the same age as me. I was only talking to him last time we were there last week. The place will not be the same without him. I always thanked him at the end of the evening when he came out of the kitchen to talk to the proprieter Tony at the bar. His home made limoncello ice cream was amazing. He will be greatly missed.

It makes me realise how luky I am to see the flowers and still be alive.